"Of course I talk to myself. I like a good speaker, and I appreciate an intelligent audience."
"A list of authors who have made themselves most beloved and therefore, most comfortable financially, shows that it is our national joy to mistake for the first-rate, the fecund rate."
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Source: Dorothy Parker (2004). “Dorothy Parker in Her Own Words”, Taylor Trade Publishing
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"The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue."
"The only dependable law of life - everything is always worse than you thought it was going to be."
"Creativity is a wild mind and a disciplined eye."
"I like to have a martini/Two at the very most/After three I'm under the table/After four I'm under my host."
"Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician."