"Of course I talk to myself. I like a good speaker, and I appreciate an intelligent audience."
"People ought to be one of two things, young or dead."
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Source: Quoted in The Sayings of Dorothy Parker, ed. S. T. Brownlow (1992)
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"The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue."
"The only dependable law of life - everything is always worse than you thought it was going to be."
"Creativity is a wild mind and a disciplined eye."
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"Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician."