"Of course I talk to myself. I like a good speaker, and I appreciate an intelligent audience."
"[To woman bragging about having kept her husband for seven years:] Don't worry, if you keep him long enough, he'll come back in style."
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Source: A Pig's-Eye View of Literature l. 10 (1928)
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More quotes by Dorothy Parker
"The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue."
"The only dependable law of life - everything is always worse than you thought it was going to be."
"Creativity is a wild mind and a disciplined eye."
"I like to have a martini/Two at the very most/After three I'm under the table/After four I'm under my host."
"Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician."