"Romance often begins by a splashing waterfall and ends over a leaky sink."
"My cat, Ethel, is an indoor cat but somehow she's sneakin' out at night. 'Cause the other morning I found a stamp on her paw... I wouldn't have noticed myself, but I just bought this new black light and she passed right under it and I said, 'Hey, what's that on you paw?"
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More quotes by Ellen DeGeneres
"I ask people why they have deer heads on their walls. They always say because it's such a beautiful animal. There you go. I think my mother is attractive, but I have photographs of her."
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"Find out who you are and be that person. That's what your soul was put on this Earth to be. Find that truth, live that truth and everything else will come."
"I really don't think I need buns of steel. I'd be happy with buns of cinnamon."
"It's our challenges and obstacles that give us layers of depth and make us interesting."