"Thanksgiving, man. Not a good day to be my pants."
"I've always been the guy who doesn't necessarily get it with women. A woman would have to say, 'I like you, I want to go out with you, you can ask me.' And still I would question it. Did she mean it?"
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More quotes by Kevin James
"I had many teachers that were great, positive role models and taught me to be a good person and stand up and be a good man. A lot of the principals they taught me still affect how I act sometimes and it's 30 years later."
"There's no better feeling in the world than a warm pizza box on your lap."
"Think first. Think twice. Think again. Respect others. Respect yourself. Respect dreams."
"Pie...it fills the cracks of the heart. Go away, pain."
"Nobody actually ever does this—escaping through a window."