"There's a saying that all roads lead to Ankh-Morpork. And it's wrong. All roads lead away from Ankh-Morpork, but sometimes people just walk along them the wrong way."
"There have been better attempts at marching, and they have been made by penguins."
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Source: Terry Pratchett (2008). “Monstrous Regiment: (Discworld Novel 31)”, p.63, Random House
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