"There's a saying that all roads lead to Ankh-Morpork. And it's wrong. All roads lead away from Ankh-Morpork, but sometimes people just walk along them the wrong way."
"When millions of tons of angry elephant come spinning through the sky, and there was no one there to hear it, does it - philosopically speaking - make a noise"
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Source: Fictional character: Narrator. Terry Pratchett's Hogfather, www.imdb.com. 2006.
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