"Whoever called snooker "chess with balls" was rude, but right."
"Experts say men think of sex every 10 seconds... What do they think of in the other nine?"
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More quotes by Clive James
"Snooker is just chess with balls."
"The British secret service was staffed at one point almost entirely by alcoholic homosexuals working for the KGB"
"A sceptic finds Dallas absurd. A cynic thinks the public doesn't"
"It is only when they go wrong that machines remind you how powerful they are."
"A life without fame can be a good life, but fame without a life is no life at all."