Oscar Wilde
Writer
"There are only two kinds of people who are really fascinating - people who know absolutely everything, and people who know absolutely nothing."
Funny Thanksgiving quotes
Funny Thanksgiving
15 quotes on this topic — from poets, philosophers, and thinkers across history.
Russell Baker
Writer
"It was dramatic to watch my grandmother decapitate a turkey with an ax the day before Thanksgiving. Nowadays the expense of hiring grandmothers for the ax work would probably qualify all turkeys so honored with gourmet status."
Erma Bombeck
Humorist, Writer
"No One Diets on Thanksgiving."
Conan O'Brien
Television Host, Comedian
"The turkey that President Obama will pardon this Thanksgiving is from California. The turkey said, "I don't need a pardon. I need a job.'"
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Browse quotes that often appear alongside funny thanksgiving — connected by shared ideas and recurring themes.