"I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it."
"The admission fee was a viper's tongue and a half-concealed stiletto. It was a sort of intellectual slaughterhouse."
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Source: Groucho Marx (2009). “Groucho And Me”, p.108, Da Capo Press
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