"I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it."
"To write an autobiography of Groucho Marx would be as asinine as to read an autobiography of Groucho Marx."
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Source: Groucho Marx (2008). “Memoirs Of A Mangy Lover”, p.213, Da Capo Press
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