"I am a person who is trained to look other people in the eye. But I can't look into the eyes of everyone who wants to look into mine; I can't emotionally cope with that kind of volume. Sunglasses are part of my armor."
"I don't play golf competitively. I tell everybody that I cheat so they won't gamble with me. That's why you can't watch football. Everybody's gambling. They don't want to watch the game; they watch the spread."
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More quotes by Jack Nicholson
"There's only two people in your life you should lie to... the police and your girlfriend."
"People who speak in metaphors should shampoo my crotch."
"My whole career strategy has been to build a base so that I could take the roles I want to play. I'd hate to think that a shorter part might not be available because I was worried about my billing."
"I'm Irish. I think about death all the time."
"Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world."