"It's good to leave your room super-messy when you're away. Whoever tries to break into your room will thought it has already been ransacked."
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Quote collection
Douglas Adams quotes (page 9 of 29)
578 quotes — follow a thought to its full quote page.
"To summarize the summary of the summary: people are a problem."
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"In the old days, writers used to sit in front of a typewriter and stare out of the window. Nowadays, because of the marvels of convergent technology, the thing you type on and the window you stare out of are now the same thing."
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"...they discovered only a small asteroid inhabited by a solitary old man who claimed repeatedly that nothing was true, though he was later discovered to be lying."
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"The Answer to the Great Question... Of Life, the Universe and Everything... Is... Forty-two,' said Deep Thought, with infinite majesty and calm."
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"We have normality. I repeat, we have normality. Anything you still can't cope with is therefore your own problem."
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"Sherlock Holmes observed that once you have eliminated the impossible then whatever remains, however improbable, must be the answer. I, however, do not like to eliminate the impossible."
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"As a result of all this hardship, dirt, thirst, and wombats, you would expect Australians to be a dour lot. Instead, they are genial, jolly, cheerful, and always willing to share a kind word with a stranger, unless they are an American."
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""What's up?" "I don't know," said Marvin, "I've never been there.""
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"First we thought the PC was a calculator. Then we found out how to turn numbers into letters with ASCII — and we thought it was a typewriter. Then we discovered graphics, and we thought it was a television. With the World Wide Web, we've realized it's a brochure."
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"He had a tremendous propensity for getting lost when driving. This was largely because of his method of “Zen” navigation, which was simply to find any car that looked as if it knew where it was going and follow it. The results were more often surprising than successful, but he felt it was worth it for the sake of the few occasions when it was both."
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"It all sounds rather naive and sentimental to be talking about children laughing and dancing and singing together when we all know perfectly well that what children do in real life is snarl and take drugs."
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"R is a velocity of measure, defined as a reasonable speed of travel that is consistent with health, mental well-being, and not being more than, say, five minutes late. It is therefore clearly as almost infinite variable figure according to circumstances, since the first two factors vary not only with speed as an absolute, but also with awareness of the third factor. Unless handled with tranquility, this equation can result in considerable stress, ulcers, and even death."
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"The last time anybody made a list of the top hundred character attributes of New Yorkers, common sense snuck in at number 79."
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"Life,” said Marvin dolefully, “loathe it or ignore it, you can’t like it."
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"42 is a nice number that you can take home and introduce to your family."
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"She had what it took: great hair, a profound understanding of strategic lip gloss, the intelligence to understand the world and a tiny secret interior deadness which meant she didn’t care."
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"Funny, how just when you think life can’t possibly get any worse it suddenly does."
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"I am a private detective. I am paid to be inquisitive and presumptuous."
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"Please relax," said the voice pleasantly, like a stewardess in an airliner with only one wing and two engines one of which is on fire, "you are perfectly safe."
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