"Strategy is buying a bottle of fine wine when you take a lady out for dinner. Tactics is getting her to drink it."
"Hotel tea is when you have to mix together a plastic envelope containing too much sugar, a small plastic pot of something which is not milk but has curdled anyway, and a thin brown packet seemingly containing the ashes of a cremated mole."
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Source: Frank Muir, Denis Norden (1984). “The utterly ultimate 'My word!' collection”, Methuen Pub Ltd
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