"A dog is not intelligent. Never trust an animal that's surprised by it's own farts"
"How do I relax? This might sound slightly ridiculous but I play the ukulele for at least an hour a day and I find something really blissful about it."
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Source: Frank Smith (2014). “To Think: In Language, Learning and Education”, p.108, Routledge
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"So, Arsenal have signed Arsene Wenger because his name sounds a bit like the club. How long before Man Utd sign Stefan Kuntz?"
"We're always hearing about risk-takers whose risks paid off, but they are no braver than those whose risks end in ridicule."