"I've spent more time playing golf than anything else the last 18 years. Just wanted to be an 80s-shooter. Got there, too."
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Golf quotes
Golf
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Golf quotes (page 8 of 110)
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"Look within, for within is the wellspring of virtue, which will not cease flowing, if you cease not from digging."
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"A golf ball is white, dimpled like a bishop's knees, and is the size of small mandarin oranges or those huge pills which vets blow down the throats of constipated cart-horses."
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"Golf is a diabolical game. It's easy to make fun of something that's so bizarre, so painful, so humiliating... yet so joyous."
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"For me, 'choking' is just another term in golf."
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"I played so bad, I got a get-well card from the IRS."
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"I won't have any competitive instincts in any sports, other than golf. I can't see being competitive in sports any more."
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"I owe everything to golf. Where else could a guy with an IQ like mine make this much money?"
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"When I'm not paralytic, I like to play golf."
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"I used to play golf with a guy who cheated so badly that he once had a hole in one and wrote down zero on the scorecard."
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"Golf isn't just about hitting a lot of drivers. I grew up playing on my front lawn, chipping and putting into soup cans, out of the ivy and over rose bushes and hedges - the little Alcott Golf and Country Club. I just loved having a wedge in my hands."
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"If you hit a hole in one every hole, you wouldn’t play golf for very long."
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"Uh, yeah, I do. The scythe was a little tricky at first, but—much like golf—turns out it’s all in the swing."
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"Most of the exercise I get is from standing and walking around laboratory tables all day. I derive more benefit and entertainment from this than some of my friends and competitors get from playing games like golf."
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"Dogbert: Scientists have discovered the gene that makes some people love golf. Dilbert: How can they tell it's the golf gene? Dogbert: It's plaid and it lies."
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"We like to hunt and golf and drive around lost, and scratch and spit, and a whole lot of other disgusting stuff."
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"I thrive on the adrenaline of excitement and danger. I just cannot stand boredom on the other side of it. Why am I a person who loves guns? I have no idea. Why do I like to go hunting? I don't know. It doesn't make sense to me. Why does somebody love golf, because that doesn't make sense to me either."
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"His golf bag does not contain a full set of irons."
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"It's just to let the other one know it can be replaced."
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"Don't wish for less problems; wish for more skills."
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