"Have you ever had sex with a horse?"
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Quote collection
Paul Merton quotes (page 2 of 2)
31 quotes — follow a thought to its full quote page.
"I think having an outsider's viewpoint is interesting and good, especially for a comedian."
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"The thing about improvisation is that it's not about what you say. It's listening to what other people say. It's about what you hear."
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"When I was nine I spent a lot of my time reading books about the history of comedy, or listening to the Goons or Hancock, humour from previous generations."
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"Am I allowed to call myself working-class now? Because obviously I'm now very rich."
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"I really don't take any interest at all in contemporary comedy."
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"When I turned about 12 or 13, I realised that being funny wasn't about remembering jokes. It was about creating them."
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"When I used to do the Edinburgh Festival, there was a bunch of guys selling fresh oysters and I'd eat ten daily - marvellous."
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"I have never sold my story, done Hello! magazine, any of that stuff. I'm not guilty of exploiting my private life for cash and then saying, 'Oh, I don't want to talk about my private life.' I've never crossed that line."
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"My favourite riposte to a heckle is to say, 'Excuse me, I'm trying to work here. How would you like it if I stood yelling down the alley while you're giving blow jobs to transsexuals?'"
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"Well, sanity, I suppose, is getting people to see the world your way."
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