"When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife."
"People think there's a rigid class system here, but dukes have been known to marry chorus girls. Some have even married Americans."
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More quotes by Prince Philip
"If I were reincarnated I would wish to be returned to Earth as a killer virus to lower human population levels."
"During the Blitz, a lot of shops had their windows blown in and put up notices saying, 'More open than usual'. I now declare this place more open than usual."
"Cannibalism is a radical but realistic solution to the problem of overpopulation."
"How do you keep the natives off the booze long enough to pass the test?"
"I would like to go to Russia very much — although the bastards murdered half my family."