"The definition of eternity is two people and a ham."
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Quote collection
Dorothy Parker quotes (page 7 of 16)
316 quotes — follow a thought to its full quote page.
"Three be the things I shall never attain: Envy, content, and sufficient champagne."
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"A girl's best friend is her mutter."
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"For this my mother wrapped me warm, And called me home against the storm, And coaxed my infant nights to quiet, And gave me roughage in my diet, And tucked me in my bed at eight, And clipped my hair, and marked my weight, And watched me as I sat and stood: That I might grow to womanhood To hear a whistle and drop my wits And break my heart to clattering bits."
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"The ones I like are ‘cheque’ and ‘enclosed.’"
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"Mrs. Ewing was a short woman who accepted the obligation borne by so many short women to make up in vivacity what they lack in number of inches from the ground."
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"Well, there are always those who cannot distinguish between glitter and glamour . . . the glamour of Isadora Duncan came from her great, torn, bewildered, foolhardy soul."
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"I shudder at the thought of men.... I'm due to fall in love again"
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"On lady novelists: As artists they're rot, but as providers they're oil wells; they gush. Norris said she never wrote a story unless it was fun to do. I understand Ferber whistles at her typewriter."
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"Money cannot buy health, but I'd settle for a diamond-studded wheelchair."
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"I might repeat to myself . . . a list of quotations from minds profound - if I can remember any of the damn things."
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"They tire of quiet, that have known the storm"
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"All I say is, nobody has any business to go around looking like a horse and behaving as if it were all right. You don't catch horses going around looking like people, do you?"
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"People ought to be one of two things, young or dead."
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"[On an actor who'd broken her leg in London:] Oh, how terrible. She must have done it sliding down a barrister."
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"This is me apologizing. I am a fool, a bird-brain, a liar and a horse-thief. I wouldn't touch a superlative again with an umbrella."
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"Her big heart did not, as is so sadly often the case, inhabit a big bosom."
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"The sun's gone dim, and the moon's gone black. For I loved him, and he didn't love back."
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"Hold your pen and spare your voice."
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"Summer makes me drowsy. Autumn makes me sing. Winter's pretty lousy, but I hate Spring."
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