Quote collection
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"Everyone's heard of Erwin Schrodinger's famous thought experiment. You put a cat in a box with a bottle of poison, which many people would suggest is about as far as you need to go."
"It was, according to the history books, the fastest coronation since Bubric the Saxon crowned himself with a very pointy crown on a hill during a thunderstorm, and reigned for one and a half seconds."
"It was amazing how many friends you could make by being bad at things, provided you were bad enough to be funny."
"Tragic heroes always moan when the gods take an interest in them, but it's the people the gods ignore who get the really tough deals"
"You know, you're rather amusingly wrong."
"You are very clever,' said the old man shyly. 'I would like to eat your brains, one day,' For some reason the books of etiquette that Daphne's grandmother had forced on her didn't quite deal with this. Of course, silly people would say to babies, 'You're so sweet I could gobble you all up!', but that sort of nonsense seemed less funny when it was said by a man in war paint who owned more than one skull. Daphne, cursed with good manners, settled for, 'It's very kind of you to say so."
"YOU MUST LEARN THE COMPASSION PROPER TO YOUR TRADE" "And what's that?" "A SHARP EDGE."
"But…but you can’t treat religion as a sort of buffet, can you? I mean, you can’t say yes please, I’ll have some of the Celestial Paradise and a helping of the Divine Plan but go easy on the kneeling and none of the Prohibition of Images, they give me wind. Its table d´hôte or nothing, otherwise…well, it would be silly."
"I wrote three books, I had three greenhouses. It seemed to me to be very satisfactory."
"Just because things are obvious doesn't mean they're true."
"Assassins did have a certain code, after all. It was dishonorable to kill someone if you weren't being paid."
"He’s bound to have done something,” Nobby repeated. In this he was echoing the Patrician’s view of crime and punishment. If there was a crime, there should be punishment. If the specific criminal should be involved in the punishment process then this was a happy accident, but if not then any criminal would do, and since everyone was undoubtedly guilty of something, the net result was that, in general terms, justice was done."
"Don't do anything I wouldn't do, if you ever find anything I wouldn't do."
"Are you a devious, plotting, unreliable madman? Ah, good, then you can be my most trusted advisor."
"Grinning like a necrophiliac in a morgue."
"This man was so absent-mindedly clever that he could paint pictures that didn’t just follow you around the room but went home with you and did the washing-up."
"Do you think there’s anything to eat in this forest?” “Yes,” said the wizard bitterly, “us."
"It's not worth doing something unless you were doing something that someone, somewere, would much rather you weren't doing."
"I may be daft but I'm no' stupid!"
"They think written words are even more powerful,’ whispered the toad. ‘They think all writing is magic. Words worry them. See their swords? They glow blue in the presence of lawyers."