"Once upon a time the plural of 'wizard' was 'war'."
Read quote
4 likes
Quote collection
Terry Pratchett quotes (page 37 of 72)
1.4K quotes — follow a thought to its full quote page.
"Every step is a first step if it's a step in the right direction."
Read quote
4 likes
"Granny Weatherwax was not a good loser. From her point of view, losing was something that happened to other people."
Read quote
4 likes
"The enemy isn’t men, or women, it’s bloody stupid people and no-one has the right to be stupid."
Read quote
4 likes
"One minute I'm just another rabbit and happy about it, next minute *whazaam*, I'm thinking. That's a major drawback if you're looking for happiness as a rabbit, let me tell you. You want grass and sex, not thoughts like 'What's it all about, when you get right down to it?'"
Read quote
4 likes
"Nanny Ogg knew how to start spelling 'banana', but didn't know how you stopped."
Read quote
4 likes
"I got into science fiction by being interested in astronomy first."
Read quote
4 likes
"And then there were cats, thought Dog. He'd surprised the huge ginger cat from next door and had attempted to reduce it to cowering jelly by means of the usual glowing stare and deep-throated growl, which had always worked on the damned in the past. This time they had earned him a whack on the nose that had made his eyes water. Cats, Dog considered, were clearly a lot tougher than lost souls. He was looking forward to a further cat experiment, which he planned would consist of jumping around and yapping excitedly at it. It was a long shot, but it just might work."
Read quote
4 likes
"Truly, he thought, the way of enlightenment is like unto half a mile of broken glass."
Read quote
4 likes
"Picture a tall, dark figure, surrounded by cornfields... NO, YOU CAN'T RIDE A CAT. WHO EVER HEARD OF THE DEATH OF RATS RIDING A CAT? THE DEATH OF RATS WOULD RIDE SOME KIND OF DOG. Picture more fields, a great horizon-spanning network of fields, rolling in gentle waves... DON'T ASK ME I DON'T KNOW. SOME KIND OF TERRIER, MAYBE. ...fields of corn, alive, whispering in the breeze... RIGHT, AND THE DEATH OF FLEAS CAN RIDE IT TOO. THAT WAY YOU KILL TWO BIRDS WITH ONE STONE. ...awaiting the clockwork of the seasons. METAPHORICALLY."
Read quote
4 likes
"I can't be talking to a tree. If I was talking to a tree I'd be mad, and I'm not mad, so trees can't talk."
Read quote
4 likes
"Sybil's female forebears had valiantly backed up their husbands as distant embassies were besieged, had given birth on a camel or in the shade of a stricken elephant, had handed around the little gold chocolates while trolls were trying to break into the compound, or had merely stayed at home and nursed such bits of husbands and sons as made it back from endless little wars. The result was a species of woman who, when duty called, turned into solid steel."
Read quote
4 likes
"Currently, it was leading him through a neighborhood that was on the downside of whatever curve you hoped you'd bought your property on the upside of. Graffiti and garbage were everywhere here. They were everywhere in the city, if it came to that, but elsewhere the garbage was better quality, and the graffiti was close to being correctly spelled. The whole area was waiting for something to happen, like a really bad fire."
Read quote
4 likes
"When a man is tired of Ankh-Morpork, he is tired of ankle-deep slurry."
Read quote
4 likes
"I express preference for a chronological sequence of events which precludes a violence."
Read quote
4 likes
"Let's see, now... in HOGFATHER there are a number of stabbings, someone's killed by a man made of knives, someone's killed by the dark, and someone just been killed by a wardrobe. It's a book about the magic of childhood. You can tell."
Read quote
4 likes
"In the first book of my Discworld series, published more than 26 years ago, I introduced Death as a character; there was nothing particularly new about this - death has featured in art and literature since medieval times, and for centuries we have had a fascination with the Grim Reaper."
Read quote
4 likes
"As large as worlds. As old as Time. As patient as a brick."
Read quote
4 likes
"He was currently wondering vaguely who Moey and Chandon were."
Read quote
4 likes
"Thats how we survive infinity - we kill it by breaking it up into small bits."
Read quote
4 likes