Quote collection
63 quotes — follow a thought to its full quote page.
"Freedom of speech does not mean that you have to agree with everything that a comedian says, but that comedian should have the freedom to be able to try to make that funny. It's the attempt that I'm trying to defend so hard, no necessarily the execution."
"I'm in awe of comics that do things that I can't do, or haven't tried doing yet."
"I admire ventriloquists, because I can't do that. I mean, I might get mistaken for a ventriloquist dummy every now and then, but I can't do what they do."
"I'm in awe of comedians that do things that I can't do, whether it be a one-liner comic like Anthony Jeselnik, whether it be social issues commentary, whether it be - hell, Carrot Top. I can't be Carrot Top. I can't."
"It's when I make a joke about Indian people and then a white person comes up to me and says, "That's wrong. You should not talk about Indian people," and the Indian people are over in the audience like, "I thought that joke was hilarious." That is so weird. Then why are you getting mad? You're burning unnecessary calories. You're getting made for the sake of getting mad. I don't understand it."
"I'm not going to talk too much politics because I'm not smart enough to do that."
"There are things that I won't joke about, but it's not because I don't think they're funny or they can't be made funny. It's just that they don't fit my particular skill set."
"Everyone just wants to hear the exact jokes that apply to them and want to - everyone wants a perfectly crafted joke for them."
"I found out if you're a funny guy, a lot of people like you."
"I'm such a damn workaholic, that it's interesting to be like, "Oh, what do I do for fun?""
"I like to talk about very different topics. I like to jump around a lot because I don't want people to come see me and then for an hour I tell jokes about being a little person. I just don't want that to happen. I understand that it's part of me, that's the first thing that you notice and it's something that people are curious about."
"I would love, obviously, just to keep doing stand-up. That's the constant. That's the thing that I'm going to do for the rest of my life, but also I would like a TV show at some point."
"Yeah, people do need to realize that just because they've seen me perform for an hour does not mean that we are now close."
"If I do talk politics it's very surface, it's not in-depth."
"I don't know how to write jokes from the point of view of a six-foot-two guy. So, I'll always talk about it, but I just don't want it to be the absolute focus of all of my act."
"Most of the times to be honest with you, I get sexually harassed certainly more than I do to females, because... they are comfortable with me, and because they know I can't take it to a dangerous place."
"I'm constantly watching satirical news programs, and just - I never want to be in a situation where someone could yell out a topic and I will have absolutely no opinion on it whatsoever, or just not even know it exists."
"Women feel safe with me. Because a woman with me knows that she can stop the situation from advancing to a point that she's comfortable at any time."
"I try not to be hateful."
"I don't take too many things too seriously."