"Here in Hollywood you can actually get a marriage license printed on an Etch-A-Sketch."
"The ACLU spent this entire holiday season protesting public displays of the nativity scene. Yeah, that's the problem with America right now: Public displays of Christ's birth, that's the problem. It's unbelievable to me. The ACLU will no longer fight for your right to put up a nativity scene, but they'll fight for the right of the local freak who wants to stumble onto the scene and have sex with one of the sheep."
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Source: Dennis Miller (2011). “Ranting Again”, p.98, Main Street Books
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