"Reading made Don Quixote a gentleman, but believing what he read made him mad."
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George Bernard Shaw quotes (page 11 of 68)
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"To me the sole hope of human salvation lies in teaching."
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"Remember that you are a human being with a soul and the divine gift of articulate speech: that your native language is the language of Shakespeare and Milton and The Bible; and don't sit there crooning like a bilious pigeon."
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"The perfect love affair is one which is conducted entirely by post."
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"Men get tired of everything, of heaven no less than of hell; and that all history is nothing but a record of the oscillations of the world between these two extremes. An epoch is but a swing of the pendulum; and each generation thinks the world is progressing because it is always moving."
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"I have found, after a good deal of consideration, that the best place to seek God is in a garden. You can dig for Him here."
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"God help England if she had no Scots to think for her."
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"There are no secrets better kept than the secrets everybody guesses."
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"I dread success. To have succeeded is to have finished one's business on earth, like the male spider who is killed by the female the moment he has succeeded in his courtship. I like the state of continual becoming, with a goal in front and not behind."
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"Life contains but two tragedies. One is not to get your heart's desire; the other is to get it."
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"I find it easy to forgive the man who invented a devilish instrument like dynamite, but how can one ever forgive the diabolical mind that invented the Nobel Prize in Literature?"
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"The road to ignorance is paved with good editors."
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"All young women begin by believing they can change and reform the men they marry. They can't."
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"Music is the brandy of the damned."
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"It is very doubtful whether man is enough of a political animal to produce a good, sensible, serious and efficient constitution. All the evidence is against it."
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"People are always blaming their circumstances for what they are. I don't believe in circumstances."
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"We are the living graves of murdered beasts."
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"If all the statisticians in the world were laid head to toe, they wouldn't be able to reach a conclusion"
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"Nobody can say a word against Greek: it stamps a man at once as an educated gentlemen."
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"Christmas is forced upon a reluctant and disgusted nation by the shopkeepers and the press; on its own merits it would wither and shrivel in the fiery breath of universal hatred."
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