"Vegetables are a must on a diet. I suggest carrot cake, zucchini bread, and pumpkin pie."
"My dream in life is to write the one gag that makes everyone in the world laugh."
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Source: Jim Davis (2012). “Garfield Pigs Out: His 42nd Book”, Ballantine Group
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"Avoid fruits and nuts. You are what you eat."
"I never met a lasagna I didn't like"
"Life is like a hot bath. It feels good while you're in it, but the longer you stay, the more wrinkled you get."
"There are so many opportunities in life, that the loss of two or three capabilities is not necessarily debilitating. A handicap can give you the opportunity to focus more on art, writing, or music."
"Life is like a Ferrari, it goes too fast. But that's ok, because you can't afford it anyway."