"I wouldn't say I was organised at all. I just have to prioritise. Is it more important for them to be organised, or to have their dinner, do you know what I mean?"
Read quote
6 likes
Quote collection
Jo Brand quotes (page 3 of 10)
193 quotes — follow a thought to its full quote page.
"It's very difficult to learn not to take nasty heckles personally."
Read quote
6 likes
"There are lots of people who believe that caricature of me the tabloids created, so they think they don't like me."
Read quote
6 likes
"I have a utilitarian approach to dressing; as long as I quite like it and it covers me up, I don't care what it is."
Read quote
6 likes
"I believe that if your brain has to get to grips with complicated words, then you won't get Alzheimer's. I'm sure it's not true, but I do believe it."
Read quote
6 likes
"So, my style has hopefully changed over the years and it is more relaxed, and I do tend to smile and have more than one expression these days hopefully - which I didn't at the beginning."
Read quote
6 likes
"I'm a terrible sort of non-fussy eater, really. I don't like posh food very much, and the more ingredients something's got in it, the less I tend to like it."
Read quote
6 likes
"You don't really see ugly people that are old, or a bit grotty and smelly, in the media. If a Martian came down, they would think we were all tall, thin, attractive and wealthy."
Read quote
6 likes
"Having done a normal job for 10 years, as a psychiatric nurse dealing with emergencies, I know what terrible, hopeless lives some people have. So in many ways, it's great to be able to wield the financial power that I can, and do gigs, fundraisers or give money. I feel lucky I can help out."
Read quote
6 likes
"Some men are deeply likable but have attitudes I don't like. Does that mean I should completely dismiss them? It's like saying: if someone votes Tory can you like them? And, yes, I can. I have friends who vote Tory, and I'm appalled, but that's not to say they're not great people in so many other ways. We have a tendency to oversimplify things."
Read quote
6 likes
"Men are fantastic - as a concept."
Read quote
6 likes
"I think there's a danger that we're moving towards a state where the people we are expected to admire are almost not human anymore, and I don't like that. I prefer it when someone looks like a nice person, and you think, 'I could have a laugh with them in the pub.'"
Read quote
5 likes
"They say revenge is a dish best eaten cold, but for most people, by the time it's ready to eat, they just don't fancy it any more."
Read quote
5 likes
"One of the guys that used to run it - for some reason I've no idea why he used to call me the Sea Monster and I was just looking around for a name and thought that'll do. That lasted for a couple of years probably."
Read quote
5 likes
"An overweight guy went to the doctor who advised him to try a keep fit DVD. But the guy said he couldn't be bothered. “Well” suggested the doctor, “try something that leaves you a little short of breath.” So the buy took up smoking."
Read quote
5 likes
"When you get to know someone, you find there's something nasty in their woodshed."
Read quote
4 likes
"To me, a politician's job is to listen to constituents' problems and try to sort them out."
Read quote
4 likes
"British ferries have stopped transporting live animals to the Continent. This has made it very difficult for England fans to get to Away matches."
Read quote
4 likes
"Anybody who has had the pleasure of reading an article about themselves in the press, knows that on the whole, there is a huge amount of inaccuracy, value judgment and the use of a crowbar to insert editorial bias that reflects the current political leaning of that particular paper."
Read quote
4 likes
"I did try when I wasn't doing the singing to do as much comedy as I could because I thought with Comic Relief you are duty bound to anyway."
Read quote
4 likes