"I feel so fortunate to be one of the lucky ones who is so grateful and appreciative to know such great synonyms for thankful."
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Quote collection
Demetri Martin quotes (page 21 of 25)
494 quotes — follow a thought to its full quote page.
"This is a pie chart about procrastination."
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"Small businesses are important, but so are tiny businesses."
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"But what I was going to say was, I just figured I'm going to go boldly in the direction of my dreams, say it as Thoreau would say, and just see where it takes me."
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"But long story short, I didn't start doing stand-up because I wanted to have a TV show or be an actor or even wanted to write sketch comedy. I got into stand-up because I love stand-up."
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"Surprise parties are strange 'cause people jump up and they yell the word, 'surprise' at the party. I came home and you emerged from my furniture. You don't have to tell me how to feel. I don't need a hint."
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"I do come across people who don't like me, don't like my comedy, don't think it's funny, it's too cutesy, or whatever they hate. And it's like, "Okay. That's your opinion. Somebody liked it, so that's good." Hopefully it balances out."
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"A large portion of the Earth's land area is taken up by old varsity jackets."
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"You need an audience to help you figure out what's working and what's worth putting on your album or your special - or even just what's worth touring with."
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"Wind chimes are also earthquake chimes."
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"I don't like thank you cards because I don't know what else to say. What do I put on the inside? See Front."
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"I tend to avoid televisions, politics, and places with velvet ropes."
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"My friend says touche way too much. He's a touche bag."
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"One of the most difficult and ironic murder weapons is the life jacket."
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"As a creative person, you want to have a foothold and sense of progress."
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"Usually, I walk around and think about things. When I come across a thought that makes me laugh, I write it down."
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"I like stand-up. But I'd also like a family and house and a yard. I want to work with a lot of people, have colleagues; and on good film sets, there's people there that work with the same people for years and years. I love that collaborative spirit in that medium. Comedy is a lot more solitary."
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"I think the most annoying language is a tie between all the ones I don't know how to speak."
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"If I make my window ten days for stand-up, the conclusion is that I failed and that I'm not good at stand-up. If I make it ten years - if I just wait - the conclusion might be something totally different. I think it's so cool to do things in which you discover the malleability of your own mind."
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"Planning trip around the globe, that is in my room."
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