"You better take care of me Lord, if you don't you're gonna have me on your hands."
Funny Life quotes
Funny Life
94 quotes on this topic — from poets, philosophers, and thinkers across history.
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Funny Life quotes (page 2 of 5)
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"He had decided to live forever or die in the attempt."
"First, I blow a hole in your face; then I go back inside, and sleep like a baby... I guarantee you."
"There is nothing more miserable in the world than to arrive in paradise and look like your passport photo."
"I'm spending a year dead for tax reasons."
"I must confess, I was born at a very early age."
"He's too nervous to kill himself. He wears his seat belt in a drive-in movie."
"There is properly no history, only biography."
"There's birth, there's death, and in between there's maintenance."
"Luck is a very thin wire between survival and disaster, and not many people can keep their balance on it."
"The gods throw the dice and they don't ask whether we want to be in the game or not."
"If I can sell tickets to my movies like Red Sonja or Last Action Hero, you know I can sell just about anything."
"I think all good drama is funny. All the best drama is ultimately very funny. Life is funny. You can't have any honest treatise on life without bumping into some humor."
"A joke is an epigram on the death of a feeling."