“Rudeness is better than any argument; it totally eclipses intellect.”
Funny feeling
Funny Quotes — page 207 of 1263
“Mankind cannot get on without a certain amount of absurdity.”
“Boredom is just the reverse side of fascination.”
“I think it's odd that grown-ups quarrel so easily and so often and about such petty matters. Up to now I always thought bickering was just something children did and that they outgrew it.”
“People ask for criticism, but they only want praise.”
“I buy expensive suits - they just look cheap on me.”
“It's certain that fine women eat A crazy salad with their meat.”
“There is no such thing as a bad whisky. Some whiskies just happen to be better than others.”
“Why, thou deboshed fish thou...Wilt thou tell a monstrous lie, being but half a fish and half a monster?”
“I sold my memoirs of my love life to Parker Brothers and they are going to make a game out of it.”
“My analyst warned me, but you were so beautiful I got another analyst.”
“Life is hard for insects. And don't think mice are having any fun either.”
“Thank God I am 20 feet tall, so my crying is never mistaken as weak. It can be mistaken as weird, but not weak.”
“If life's journey be endless where is its goal? The answer is, it is everywhere. We are in a palace which has no end, but which we have reached. By exploring it and extending our relationship with it we are ever making it more and more our own.”
“At least you don’t need a prescription for tequila.”
“Fame — the aggregate of all the misunderstandings that collect around a new name.”
“Sometimes the lines in a song are lines you wish you could text-message somebody in real life.”
“It feels like a perfect night, to dress up like hipsters, and make fun of our exes.”
“You've got a lot of time for abstract thought when you've got your hand stuck up a dead badger.”
“Maybe the only significant difference between a really smart simulation and a human being was the noise they made when you punched them.”