"Guys play characters that won't grow up and something catastrophic happens and they have to grow up to save the day - that's pretty much what today's comedy is about."
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Quote collection
Chris Rock quotes (page 15 of 17)
334 quotes — follow a thought to its full quote page.
"When you're making a real documentary, you shoot it and the movie happens. You don't make - this sounds corny - you don't make a documentary, a documentary makes you. It really does."
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"I have four jackets, five pants, whatever, that are all the same. If you see U2 in concert, they wear the same thing every night. They just got a bunch of them. Albert Einstein used to wear brown suits every day. Why waste brainpower on something that is trivial?"
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"I'm pretty good at getting over people throwing stuff at me. If you've been doing stand up long enough you know how to swing back and get the laughs."
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"My kids don't have a trust fund, they have a debt fund. Oh my God, they're $4 million in the hole."
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"Now that I have children, I realize taking care of my children is more fun than anything in the whole world."
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"Comedians tend to find a comfort zone and stay there and do lamer versions of themselves for the rest of their career."
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"I pray there's a God...I know there's an Oprah."
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"My goal in life was to host the MTV Awards, because it's the awards show that Prince sang on, and that was the awards show that Eddie Murphy hosted and Arsenio hosted."
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"When you become a comedian a lot of stuff that made you laugh before just stops. You stop watching your old cartoons you used to watch. You stop reading the funnies. It's like working at a strip club. You don't come home and turn on the Playboy Channel."
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"I am just here to support the President of the United States. President of the United States is our boss, but he is also... you know, the President and the First Lady are kinda like the Mom and the Dad of the country. And when your Dad says something you listen, and when you don't it will usually bite you on the ass later on. So, I'm here to support the President."
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"A cat, by any other name, is still a sneaky little furball that barfs on the furniture."
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"You can write a great country record and still be angry. Who's angrier than Toby Keith? He's angrier than the average 10 rappers."
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"When I do something good, the audience lets me know immediately. They laugh. That's it."
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"I've remade a few movies and they all have one thing in common: great endings. If you're going to remake something, make sure that ending is tight. It's a little less challenging, if you have a great ending. If you don't have a great ending, don't remake the movie."
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"Black comics, they only watch Black comedians. You're a comedian; you're not just a Black comedian. You're a comedian. I try to get that through to everybody."
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"I've told Michael Jackson jokes. If you got really technical, you could say those are jokes about child molestation. You could, if you got technical. A lot of this is just selective outrage because honestly, the audience are the ones that tell us that something shouldn't be spoken. The audience lets us know. And I've never, in my almost 30 years of being a comedian, seen a comedian continue to tell a joke that the audience doesn't respond to. I've never seen it."
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"I love seeing black people do normal things, being judged as normal people."
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"There's always a moment in any stand-up show I do where people are booing. They kinda boo a premise. And then I bail myself out with a joke. But it's like trying to do movies where there's a dramatic undertone."
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"Black people have been qualified to be president for hundreds of years. George Washington Carver could have been president. I could go on with a list of black men that were qualified to be the president of the United States. So the Obama victory is progress for white people."
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