"Radio is a bag of mediocrity where little men with carbon minds wallow in sluice of their own making."
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Quote collection
Fred Allen quotes (page 4 of 5)
94 quotes — follow a thought to its full quote page.
"I have just returned from Boston. It is the only thing to do if you find yourself up there."
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"An actor's popularity is fleeting. His success has the life expectancy of a small boy who is about to look into a gas tank with a lighted match."
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"The last time I saw him he was walking down lover's lane holding his own hand."
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"He dreamed he was eating shredded wheat and woke up to find the mattress half gone."
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"We are living in the machine age. For the first time in history the comedian has been compelled to supply himself with jokes and comedy material to compete with the machine. Whether he knows it or not, the comedian is on a treadmill to oblivion."
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"My uncle is a Southern planter. He's an undertaker in Alabama."
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"Television is a triumph of equipment over people."
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"A molehill man is a pseudo-busy executive who comes to work at 9 AM and finds a molehill on his desk. He has until 5 PM to make this molehill into a mountain. An accomplished molehill man will often have his mountain finished before lunch."
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"The average girl would rather have beauty than brains because she knows the average man can see much better than he can think- Ladies' Home JournalI'd rather have two girls at seventeen than one at thirty-four"
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"A committee is a group of people who individually can do nothing, but who, as a group, can meet and decide that nothing can be done."
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"In show business, more showgirls are kept than promises."
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"Everywhere outside New York City is Bridgeport, Connecticut."
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"My agent gets 10 percent of everything I get, except the blinding headaches."
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"With the advance of refrigeration, I hope that along with the frozen foods someday we will have frozen conversation. A person will be able to keep a frozen promise indefinitely."
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"Hollywood is a great place if you're an orange."
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"It was once rumored that fledgling executives walked around their offices backwards so they wouldn't have to face an issue."
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"She used to be a teacher but she has no class now."
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"I'm going to Boston to see my doctor. He's a very sick man."
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"A telescope will magnify a star a thousand times, but a good press agent can do even better."
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