Humorous quotes
1.6K quotes on this topic — from poets, philosophers, and thinkers across history.
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Browse quotes that often appear alongside humorous — connected by shared ideas and recurring themes.
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"Primitive societies, or social groupings, had shamans, and some of them even more recent in time. Shamans were tricksters. There was a tradition of the trickster, and the trickster was a clown, a humorous fellow. His task was to trick the gods, to humor the gods into laughing, so that there was access to the divine - because laughter is a moment when we are completely ourselves."
"Next time I see you, remind me not to talk to you."
"If you want to see a comic strip, you should see me in the shower."
"Wagner’s music is better than it sounds."
"There's little in taking or giving, There's little in water or wine: This living, this living, this living, Was never a project of mine. Oh, hard is the struggle, and sparse is The gain of the one at the top, For art is a form of catharsis, And love is a permanent flop, And work is the province of cattle, And rest's for a clam in a shell, So I'm thinking of throwing the battle - Would you kindly direct me to hell?"
"There is no such passion in human nature, as the passion for gravy among commercial gentlemen."
"There are two things that are more difficult than making an after-dinner speech: climbing a wall which is leaning toward you and kissing a girl who is leaning away from you."
"I love nature, I just don't want to get any of it on me."
"Photons have mass? I didn’t even know they were Catholic."
"What if nothing exists and we're all in somebody's dream? Or what's worse, what if only that fat guy in the third row exists?"
"Poetry, I think, intensifies the reader's experience. If it's a humorous facet of the story, poetry makes it more exuberant. If it's a sad facet, poetry can make it more poignant."
"All for one; one for all."
"The peculiar habit, when searching for a snack, of constantly returning to the refrigerator in hopes that something new will have materialized."
"Smoking is indispensable if one has nothing to kiss."
"I've been thinking of humorous things since I was... I can't remember when. All the way through elementary school, all the way through junior high, all the way through high school, through college and after college, I was thinking of the same kinds of things that I say in front of an audience now."
"SCCS, the source motel! Programs check in and never check out!"
"There are no grades of vanity; there are only grades of ability in concealing it."
"Figures often beguile me, particularly when I have the arranging of them myself; in which case the remark attributed to Disraeli would often apply with justice and force: "There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics.""
"The best doctors in the world are Doctor Diet, Doctor Quiet, and Doctor Merryman."
"The wicked at heart probably know something."
