“In America, anyone can become president. That's the problem.”
Funny feeling
Funny Quotes — page 11 of 1263
“If women ran the world, we wouldn't have wars, just intense negotiations every 28 days.”
“Omnia apud me mathematica fiunt.”
“When I was in high school I asked myself at one point: "Why do I care if my high school's team wins the football game? I don't know anybody on the team, they have nothing to do with me... why am I here and applaud? It does not make any sense." But the point is, it does make sense: It's a way of building up irrational attitudes of submission to authority and group cohesion behind leadership elements. In fact it's training in irrational jingoism. That's also a feature of competitive sports.”
“Any single man must judge for himself whether circumstances warrant obedience or resistance to the commands of the civil magistrate; we are all qualified, entitled, and morally obliged to evaluate the conduct of our rulers. This political judgment, moreover, is not simply or primarily a right, but like self-preservation, a duty to God. As such it is a judgment that men cannot part with according to the God of Nature. It is the first and foremost of our inalienable rights without which we can preserve no other.”
“Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall with a joint, drinking some eight-ball.”
“Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music.”
“Never have so many been manipulated so much by so few.”
“It's pretty clear now that what looked like it might have been some kind of counterculture is, in reality, just the plain old chaos of undifferentiated weirdness.”
“Pop life Everybody needs a thrill Pop life We all got a space 2 fill Pop life Everybody can't be on top But life it ain't real funky Unless it's got that pop Dig it.”
“I like to have a martini/Two at the very most/After three I'm under the table/After four I'm under my host.”
“To truly laugh, you must be able to take your pain, and play with it!”
“Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.”
“It takes a smart brunette to play a dumb blonde.”
“Sometimes I think that Jesus watches my neurotic struggles, and shakes his head and grips his forehead and starts tossing back mojitos.”
“You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.”
“The point of public relations slogans like "Support Our Troops" is that they don't mean anything ... that's the whole point of good propaganda. You want to create a slogan that nobody is going to be against and I suppose everybody will be for, because nobody knows what it means, because it doesn't mean anything. But its crucial value is that it diverts your attention from a question that does mean something, do you support our policy? And that's the one you're not allowed to talk about.”
“There is a planet named Pluto, but we don't have one named Goofy. Goofy would be a good name for this planet. It certainly qualifies.”
“If the black box flight recorder is never damaged during a plane crash, why isn’t the whole airplane made out of that stuff?”
“There's no defense against stupidity.”