Funny feeling

Funny Quotes — page 16 of 1263

Dorothy Parker Poet, Writer, Critic
Funny

“Lady, lady, never start Conversation toward your heart; Keep your pretty words serene; Never murmur what you mean. Show yourself, by word and look, Swift and shallow as a brook. Be as cool and quick to go As a drop of April snow; Be as delicate and gay As a cherry flower in May. Lady, lady, never speak Of the tears that burn your cheek- She will never win him, whose Words had shown she feared to lose. Be you wise and never sad, You will get your lovely lad. Never serious be, nor true, And your wish will come to you- And if that makes you happy, kid, You'll be the first it ever did.”

136 likes
Octavia Butler Author, Novelist
Funny

“Choose your leaders with wisdom and forethought. To be led by a coward is to be controlled by all that the coward fears. To be led by a fool is to be led by the opportunists who control the fool. To be led by a thief is to offer up your most precious treasures to be stolen. To be led by a liar is to ask to be told lies. To be led by a tyrant is to sell yourself and those you love into slavery.”

136 likes
Albert Einstein Physicist
Funny

“When you sit with a nice girl for two hours, it seems like two minutes; when you sit on a hot stove for two minutes, it seems like two hours. That's relativity.”

135 likes
Woodrow Wilson Politician
Funny

“If a dog will not come to you after having looked you in the face, you should go home and examine your conscience.”

135 likes
Kurt Cobain Musician, Singer-Songwriter
Funny

“Life is a waste of time and time is a waste of life, so let's all get wasted and have the time of our lives.”

134 likes
Angus Young Musician
Funny

“The best AC/DC cover I've heard? There was an all-girl cover band in America, the Hell's Belles.”

133 likes
Ramakrishna Spiritual Leader
Funny

“Why does God allow evil in the world? To thicken the plot.”

132 likes