“Handsome is as handsome does”
Funny feeling
Funny Quotes — page 18 of 1263
“I love to talk about nothing. It's the only thing I know anything about.”
“She call me the referee cause I be so official. My shirt aint got no stripes but I can make that pussy whistle.”
“Two things people throughout history have had in common are hatred and humour. I am proud that I have been able to use humour to lessen people's hatred.”
“Victorious warriors win first and then go to war, while defeated warriors go to war first and then seek to win.”
“By Gryffindor, the bravest were Prized far beyond the rest; For Ravenclaw, the cleverest Would always be the best; For Hufflepuff, hard workers were Most worthy of admission; And power-hungry Slytherin Loved those of great ambition.”
“The lack of money is the root of all evil.”
“If you wear a short enough skirt, the party will come to you.”
“Everything changes, even stone.”
“If I can't practice, I can't practice. It is as simple as that. I ain't about that at all. It's easy to sum it up if you're just talking about practice. We're sitting here, and I'm supposed to be the franchise player, and we're talking about practice. I mean listen, we're sitting here talking about practice, not a game, not a game, not a game, but we're talking about practice. Not the game that I go out there and die for and play every game like it's my last, but we're talking about practice man. How silly is that?”
“If life gives you limes, make margaritas.”
“I've had great success being a total idiot.”
“The only thing that interferes with my learning is my education.”
“I went for a walk last night and she asked me how long I was going to be gone. I said, 'The whole time.”
“While silly ni**as argue over who gon' snatch the crown / Look around my ni**a, white people have snatched the sound / This year I'll probably go to the awards dappered down / Watch Iggy win a Grammy as I try to crack a smile.”
“Everyone has a right to be stupid, but Comrade MacDonald abuses the privilege.”
“I was educated once - it took me years to get over it.”
“I have always been among those who believed that the greatest freedom of speech was the greatest safety, because if a man is a fool, the best thing to do is to encourage him to advertise the fact by speaking.”
“Color in a picture is like enthusiasm in life.”
“A gentleman is someone who can play the accordion, but doesn't.”