“Nobody notices it when your zipper is up, but everyone notices when it's down.”
Funny feeling
Funny Quotes — page 120 of 1263
“Karma is God's girlfriend.”
“I like to be the right thing in the wrong space and the wrong thing in the right space. But usually being the right thing in the wrong space and the wrong thing in the right space is worth it, because something funny always happens.”
“Once you're on stage you can't go back, even when things go wrong people expect you to stay there and entertain them. When all else fails, you've got to try tap dancing.”
“There are 2 rules in extreme snowriding: First, always follow your heart; second, never cry when it hurts.”
“Never eat in a restaurant that has a bowling trophy on the cash register.”
“Friendship is like money, easier made than kept.”
“A film is like a battleground. It's love, hate, action, violence, death—In one word, emotions.”
“The female mind is certainly a devious one, my lord." Vetinari looked at his secretary in surprise. "Well, of course it is. It has to deal with the male one.”
“The guy who invented the first wheel was an idiot. The guy who invented the other three, he was a genius.”
“Sarcastic people tend to be marshmallows underneath the armor”
“We could say the government spend like drunken sailors, but that would be unfair to drunken sailors, because the sailors are spending their own money.”
“Weak leadership can wreck the soundest strategy”
“The peak efficiency of knowledge and strategy is to make conflict unnecessary.”
“Attack is the secret of defense; defense is the planning of an attack.”
“I have respect for beer.”
“Welcome to a new year at Hogwarts! Before we begin our banquet, I would like to say a few words. And here they are: Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak!”
“To err is human, but it feels divine.”
“Save a boyfriend for a rainy day - and another, in case it doesn't rain.”
“When I'm good, I'm very good. But when I'm bad I'm better.”