Funny feeling

Funny Quotes — page 128 of 1263

Eugene McCarthy Politician
Funny

“There is danger in the concentration of control in the television and radio networks, especially in the large television and radio stations; danger in the concentration of ownership in the press...and danger in the increasing concentration of selection by book publishers and reviewers and by the producers of radio and television programs.”

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Dana Gould Comedian
Funny

“They say that cats are the only animal that can sit in your lap and ignore you. To which I say: you've never been to the Spearmint Rhino.”

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Bell Hooks Author, Feminist, Social Activist
Funny

“When men and women punish each other for truth telling, we reinforce the notion that lies are better.”

Demetri Martin Comedian, Actor
Funny

“Sometimes if I really want to get someone's attention, I'll start a sentence with something like, "I'm not racist, but..." I say, "I'm not racist, but you look great today." They say, "That wasn't racist at all." I said, "I know. I said I'm not racist. You never listen. Typical Mexican."”

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D
Drake Rapper, singer, songwriter
Funny

“Open books, not legs. Blow minds, not guys”

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Dwight D. Eisenhower Military Leader, Politician
Funny

“An atheist is a man who watches a Notre Dame - Southern Methodist University game and doesn't care who wins.”

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Clarice Lispector Novelist, Short Story Writer
Funny

“You don't understand music: you hear it. So hear me with your whole body.”

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Bill Hicks Comedian, Writer
Funny

“Why is marijuana against the law? It grows naturally upon our planet. Doesn’t the idea of making nature against the law seem to you a bit . . . unnatural?”

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Bruce Dickinson Musician, Author, Pilot
Funny

“I don't have interns. I don't have a manager. I don't have assistants. I don't have a secretary. I can't figure out Outlook Express. I'm the worst person in the world answering e-mails, and my phone is probably the oldest, most battered phone you can find. So I just talk to people.”

Angus Young Musician
Funny

“Actually, because I'm so small, when I strike an open A chord I get physically thrown to the left, and when I play an open G chord I go right. That's how hard I play, and that's how a lot of my stage act has come about. I just go where the guitar takes me.”

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Angus Young Musician
Funny

“I don't like to play above or below people's heads. Basically, I just like to get up in front of a crowd and rip it up.”

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Anthony Bourdain Chef, Author, Television Personality
Funny

“Always was Morocco. And recently the country's leadership seems to have embraced it in all its ill-reputed glory. The days of predatory poets in search of literary inspiration and young flesh are probably over for good. Hippies can just as easily get their bong riffs in Portland or Peoria. But the good stuff, the real good stuff, the sounds and smells and the look of Tangier -- what you see and hear when you lean out the window and take it all in -- that's here to stay.”

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Viktor E. Frankl Psychiatrist, Neurologist
Funny

“Humor was another of the soul's weapons in the fight for self-preservation.”

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Samuel Johnson Lexicographer, Essayist, Critic
Funny

“Whoever thinks of going to bed before twelve o'clock is a scoundrel.”

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