Funny feeling

Funny Quotes — page 63 of 1263

Leonard Cohen Singer-Songwriter
Funny

“The blizzard of the world has crossed the threshold and it's overturned the order of the soul.”

62 likes
Lewis Carroll Author, Mathematician
Funny

“If you want to inspire confidence, give plenty of statistics. It does not matter that they should be accurate, or even intelligible, as long as there is enough of them.”

62 likes
Mark Twain Writer, Humorist
Funny

“Consider the average intelligence of the common man, then realize 50% are even stupider.”

62 likes
Mark Twain Writer, Humorist
Funny

“Among other common lies, we have the silent lie - the deception which one conveys by simply keeping still and concealing the truth. Many obstinate truth-mongers indulge in this dissipation, imagining that if they speak no lie, they lie not at all.”

John Lennon Musician, Activist
Funny

“The postman wants an autograph. The cab driver wants a picture. The waitress wants a handshake. Everyone wants a piece of you.”

John Smith Politician
Funny

“The best way to manipulate a man is to make him think he is manipulating you.”

62 likes
Joan Didion Author, Essayist
Funny

“To cure jealousy is to see it for what it is, a dissatisfaction with self.”

62 likes
EB
Erma Bombeck Humorist, Writer
Funny

“My theory on housework is, if the item doesn't multiply, smell, catch fire, or block the refrigerator door, let it be. No one else cares. Why should you?”

61 likes
Dwight D. Eisenhower Military Leader, Politician
Funny

“A sense of humor is part of the art of leadership, of getting along with people, of getting things done.”

61 likes
Chris Rock Comedian, Actor, Writer
Funny

“In the world of animation, you can be anything you wanna be. If you're a fat woman, you can play a skinny princess. If you're short wimpy guy, you can play a tall gladiator. If you're a white man, you can play an Arabian prince. And if you're a black man, you can play a donkey or a zebra.”

61 likes
Bob Marley Musician, Singer-Songwriter
Funny

“If something can corrupt you, you're corrupted already.”

61 likes