“When life gives you lemons, throw them at the zombies.”
Funny feeling
Funny Quotes — page 81 of 1263
“Sex is more exciting on the screen and between the pages than between the sheets.”
“Boys will be boys. And even that wouldn't matter if only we could prevent girls from being girls.”
“Don't pole-vault over mouse turds.”
“More! More! is the cry of a mistaken soul.”
“Don't follow me, I'm lost.”
“In so far as one denies what is, one is possessed by what is not, the compulsions, the fantasies, the terrors that flock to fill the void.”
“Are you asking me to undress, Tris?' A nervous laugh gurgles from my throat. 'Only ... partially”
“Nothing is funnier than unhappiness, I grant you that. Yes, yes, it's the most comical thing in the world.”
“Never trust a species that grins all the time. It’s up to something.”
“But for the use of physical punishment by, and fear of their oppressors, animals would never be a part of a circus.”
“I worked in a health food store once. A guy asked me, 'If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?”
“Some years ago, the federal government declared war on poverty, and poverty won.”
“Convince your enemy that he will gain very little by attacking you; this will diminish his enthusiasm”
“Once you get to earth orbit, you're halfway to anywhere in the solar system.”
“No flip flops for black dudes. I don’t care where you at. Wear some hot ass Jordans on the beach.”
“Don't talk to me." "Why not?" "Because I want to fix that in my memory for ever. Draco Malfoy, the amazing bouncing ferret.”
“Ah, go boil yer heads, both of yeh", said Hagrid. “Harry — yer a wizard.”
“Awake, my Little ones, and fill the Cup Before Life's Liquor in its Cup be dry.”
“If you have to talk to more than three people about the same problem, you don't want help, you want attention.”