“Poetry is not an expression of the party line. It's that time of night, lying in bed, thinking what you really think, making the private world public, that's what the poet does.”
Funny feeling
Funny Quotes — page 79 of 1263
“A fool contributes nothing worth hearing and takes offense at everything.”
“We need to accept that we won't always make the right decisions, that we'll screw up royally sometimes - understanding that failure is not the opposite of success, it's part of success.”
“My name is only an anagram of toilets.”
“I'm puttin' pressure on you kids like I'm a soccer mom.”
“I still eat a burger at a counter with ketchup dripping down my face.”
“The beet is the most intense of vegetables. The radish, admittedly, is more feverish, but the fire of the radish is a cold fire, the fire of discontent, not of passion. Tomatoes are lusty enough, yet there runs through tomatoes an undercurrent of frivolity. Beets are deadly serious.”
“I think people should elect a cat person. If you elect a dog person, you elect someone who wants to be loved. If you elect a cat person, you elect someone who wants to serve.”
“When we started I wasn't the singer. I was the drunk rhythm guitarist who wrote all these weird songs.”
“I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone.”
“If you liked being a teenager, there's something really wrong with you.”
“If you believe that I'm a cop killer, you believe David Bowie is an astronaut.”
“Woman begins by resisting a man's advances and ends by blocking his retreat.”
“A man who takes himself too seriously will find that no one else takes him seriously.”
“Seriousness is the only refuge of the shallow.”
“I go in the sea as little as I can. If there's a girl and I have to accompany her, then obviously I go (laughs)!”
“What the hell-you might be right, you might be wrong...but don't just avoid.”
“Twitter should ban my mother.”
“Time-Use it or lose it. Time, like a snowflake, disappears while we're trying to decide what to do with it. The surest way to be late is to have plenty of time.”
“I remember the first time I had sex - I kept the receipt.”