"The good sleep better, but the bad seem to enjoy the waking hours much more."
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Quote collection
Woody Allen quotes (page 10 of 41)
818 quotes — follow a thought to its full quote page.
"Writing is great because in the writing you never have to... First of all you never have to leave your home. And you never have to meet the test of reality when you're writing."
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"Love is too weak a word for what I feel - I luuurve you, you know, I loave you, I luff you, two F's, yes."
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"To me nature is... spiders and bugs, and big fish eating little fish, and plants eating plans, and animals eating... It's like an enormous restaurant, that's the way I see it."
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"What is it about death that bothers me? Probably the hours."
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"How can I believe in God when just last week I got my tongue caught in the roller of an electric typewriter?"
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"I heard that Commentary and Dissent had merged and formed Dysenery."
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"I believe there is something out there watching us. Unfortunately, it's the government."
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"How does gravity work? And if it were to cease suddenly, would certain restaurants still require a jacket?"
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"Can you believe that? She says I'm not leader enough for her. Who was she looking for... Hitler?"
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"Standard mathematics has recently been rendered obsolete by the discovery that for years we have been writing the numeral five backward. This has led to reevaluation of counting as a method of getting from one to ten. Students are taught advanced concepts of Boolean algebra, and formerly unsolvable equations are dealt with by threats of reprisals."
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"I don't own a computer. I've never seen anything online at all - nothing. I don't own a word processor. I have none of that stuff. It's not an act of rebellion. I'm just not a gadget person."
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"It seemed the world was divided into good and bad people. The good ones slept better while the bad ones seemed to enjoy the waking hours much more."
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"There is something about big cities that turns me on, and for whatever mysterious reason, places like New York and Paris inspire me. I think it's because cities represent civilization, and as crime-ridden and broken down as some of them are, it's still better than skipping through a meadow."
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"There are two important things in the world, the first is sex. The other isn't all that important."
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"Tradition is the illusion of permanance."
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"Some guy hit my fender, and I told him, 'Be fruitful and multiply,' but not in those words."
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"God is silent. Now if only man would shut up."
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"I just can't listen to any more Wagner, you know...I'm starting to get the urge to conquer Poland."
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"Men would make love with any number of women ... even total strangers, while females were selective. They were catering to the demands of one small egg. While males had millions of frantic sperms screaming: "Let us out, let us out!"."
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