"A "Bay Area Bisexual" told me I didn't quite coincide with either of her desires."
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Quote collection
Woody Allen quotes (page 2 of 41)
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"Of all the wonders of nature, a tree in summer is perhaps the most remarkable; with the possible exception of a moose singing 'Embraceable You' in spats."
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"It is clear the future holds great opportunities. It also holds pitfalls. The trick will be to avoid the pitfalls, seize the opportunities, and get back home by six o'clock."
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"All things are possible, except skiing through a revolving door."
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"What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet."
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"My luck is getting worse and worse. Last night, for instance, I was mugged by a quaker."
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"Reality may not be the best of all possible worlds, but it's still the only place where you can get a decent steak."
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"My mother never had time for me. When you're the middle child in a family of five million, you don't get any attention."
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"I once stole a pornographic book that was printed in braille. I used to rub the dirty parts."
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"I don't think my parents liked me. They put a live teddy bear in my crib."
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"I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead - not sick, not wounded - dead."
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"I'm going to my psychoanalyst one more year, then I'm going to Lourdes."
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"Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television."
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"If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss bank."
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"While we're waiting for a cab I'll give you your lesson for today. Don't listen to what your teachers tell ya, you know. Don't pay attention. Just, just see what they look like and that's how you'll know what life is really gonna be like."
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"Take the money and run."
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"I'm giving [my analyst] one more year--then I'm going to Lourdes."
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"I'm such a good lover because I practice a lot on my own."
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"In California, they don't throw their garbage away - they make it into TV shows."
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"I don't have to 'freedom-kiss' my wife when what I really want to do is French-kiss her."
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