“(M)aybe we too busy being flowers or fairies or strawberries instead of something honest and worthy of respect . . . you know . . . like being people.”
Funny feeling
Funny Quotes — page 105 of 1263
“Memory warps time, as it does the sights and sounds and smells of reality; for what shapes it is emotion, which can twist what seems clear, just as the surface of a pond seems to bend the stick thrust into the water.”
“Americans are making coffee a bigger part of their lives, expanding attitudes and behaviors that are driving new levels of consumption.”
“Nobody takes a picture of something they want to forget.”
“Do not engage an enemy more powerful than you. And if it is unavoidable and you do have to engage, then make sure you engage it on your terms, not on your enemy's terms.”
“You will find that I will only truly have left this school when none here are loyal to me.”
“People aren't really poor until they start using water on their corn flakes.”
“Being sexy is something inside, and not everybody has it.”
“I used to butcher my Barbies. I would draw hearts on their cheeks. I would give them haircuts and I would keep going because it would be uneven and they would be left bald”
“I like hearing myself talk. It is one of my greatest pleasures. I often have long conversations all by myself. Sometimes I am so clever I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.”
“Weapons are an important factor in war, but not the decisive one; it is man and not materials that counts.”
“With my sunglasses on, I'm Jack Nicholson. Without them, I'm fat and 60.”
“Debating against him is no fun, say something insulting and he looks at you like a whipped dog.”
“I like both Blu-ray and DVD, but Blu-ray gives you more options.”
“That's all that it's going to be. God bless them. But you know what? I've got a nice house and a kid in college, and I'll tell you, we cannot handle it. Giving our paycheck away when you still worked and earned it? That's just not going to fly.”
“The surest way to be late is to have plenty of time”
“If the garbage man calls, tell him we don't want any.”
“Beer is an improvement on water itself.”
“Truth is a great flirt.”
“The more you can increase fear of drugs and crime, welfare mothers, immigrants and aliens, the more you control all the people.”