“Flops are a part of life's menu and I've never been a girl to miss out on any of the courses.”
Funny feeling
Funny Quotes — page 232 of 1263
“Don't try to make children grow up to be like you, or they may do it.”
“Life is always walking up to us and saying, "Come on in, the living's fine," and what do we do? Back off and take its picture.”
“Tennis is an addiction that once it has truly hooked a man will not let him go.”
“I can't give you a brain, but I can give you a diploma.”
“I don't know what's better: getting laid or getting paid. I just know when I'm getting one, the other's getting away.”
“'What you doing in the club on a Thursday?' She say she only here for her girl birthday... They ordered champagne but still look thirsty, Rock Forever 21 but just turned 30.”
“What happened down in the dungeons between you and Professor Quirrell is a complete secret, so, naturally the whole school knows.”
“Gryffindor leads by eighty points to zero, and look at that Firebolt go! Potter’s really putting it through its paces now, see it turn — Chang’s Comet is just no match for it, the Firebolt’s precision-balance is really noticeable in these long —” “JORDAN! ARE YOU BEING PAID TO ADVERTISE FIREBOLTS? GET ON WITH THE COMMENTARY!”
“Yeah, size is no guarantee of power,” said George. “Look at Ginny.” “What d’you mean?” said Harry. “You’ve never been on the receiving end of one of her Bat-Bogey Hexes, have you?”
“Everyone queue up!' Malfoy roared to the crowd. 'Harry Potter's giving out signed photos!”
“Vot is the point of being an international Quidditch player if all the good-looking girls are taken?”
“Better be jocund with the fruitful Grape Than sadden after none, or bitter, Fruit.”
“Life's too short to bullshit.”
“Some people out there think everything I do is a publicity stunt, they think when I go to the bathroom it's a publicity stunt.”
“It ain't no sin if you crack a few laws now and then, just so long as you don't break any.”
“I've no time for broads who want to rule the world alone. Without men, who'd do up the zipper on the back of your dress?”
“When women go wrong, men go right after them.”
“If I had no sense of humor I should long ago have committed suicide.”
“If it weren't for Christians, I'd be a Christian.”