Funny feeling

Funny Quotes — page 161 of 1263

J. K. Rowling Novelist, Screenwriter
Funny

“When he straightened up again, there were six Harry Potters gasping and panting in front of him. Fred and George turned to each other and said together, "Wow -- we're identical!”

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Oliver Wendell Holmes Sr. Physician, Poet, Essayist
Funny

“Why can't somebody give us a list of things that everybody thinks and nobody says, and another list of things that everybody says and nobody thinks?”

Mae West Actress, Singer, Screenwriter
Funny

“Never mind about the six feet. Let's talk about the seven inches.”

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Mahatma Gandhi Political Leader
Funny

“Man has the supreme knack of deceiving himself; the Englishman is supremest among men.”

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Oscar Wilde Writer
Funny

“Yet each man kills the thing he loves By each let this be heard Some do it with a bitter look Some with a flattering word The coward does it with a kiss The brave man with a sword”

Oscar Wilde Writer
Funny

“One should always eat muffins quite calmly. It is the only way to eat them.”

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Mao Zedong Politician, Revolutionary
Funny

“Oxford shirts. Definitely more oxford shirts.”

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FK
Florence King Author
Funny

“I wasn't used to children and they were getting on my nerves. Worse, it appeared that I was a child, too. I hadn't known that before; I thought I was just short.”

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Fran Lebowitz Author, Essayist
Funny

“I wouldn't say that I dislike the young. I'm simply not a fan of naïveté.”

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Katt Williams Comedian, Actor
Funny

“Buy a condom, ribbed for her pleasure. Turn it inside out, now it's ribbed for your pleasure.”

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George Carlin Comedian, Actor
Funny

“What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?”

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George Carlin Comedian, Actor
Funny

“Griddle cakes, pancakes, hot cakes, flapjacks: why are there four names for grilled batter and only one word for love?”

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