Funny feeling

Funny Quotes — page 188 of 1263

John Oliver Comedian
Funny

“I think Americans still can't help but respond to the natural authority of this voice. Deep down they long to be told what to do by a British accent. That's why so many infomercials have British people.”

22 likes
John Oliver Comedian
Funny

“The moment I accept that there's an artistic, redeeming quality in puns, I have a horrible feeling I'll get hooked.”

Johnny Depp Actor, Producer
Funny

“[on buying a private island] Money doesn't buy you happiness, but it buys you a big enough yacht to sail right up to it.”

22 likes
Johnny Carson Television Host
Funny

“Anytime four New Yorkers get into a cab together without arguing, a bank robbery has just taken place.”

Johnny Carson Television Host
Funny

“George Burns has been on my show twenty or thirty times, or maybe more. How can you turn down a guy that age?”

22 likes
Joseph Heller Novelist
Funny

“The Texan turned out to be good-natured, generous and likable. In three days no one could stand him.”

22 likes
Martin Luther King, Jr. Civil Rights Leader
Funny

“We must see the great distinction between a reform movement and a revolutionary movement. We are called upon to raise certain basic questions about the whole society . . . . What America must be told today is that she must be born again. The whole structure of American life must be changed.”

Lord Byron Poet, Novelist
Funny

“Society is now one polished horde, formed of two mighty tries, the Bores and Bored.”

22 likes
LB
Lord Buckley Comedian, Performer
Funny

“The bad jazz that a cat blows wails long after he’s cut out.”

22 likes
Barack Obama Politician
Funny

“Pot had helped, and booze, maybe a little blow when you could afford it.”

21 likes
Prince Musician, Singer, Songwriter
Funny

“I'm going down 2 Alphabet Street I'm gonna crown the first girl that I meet I'm gonna talk so sexy She'll want me from my head 2 my feet.”

21 likes
Prince Philip Royalty
Funny

“We didn't have counsellors rushing around every time somebody let off a gun. You just got on with it!”

21 likes
Paul Desmond Musician
Funny

“Milton, of all people, gave the most perfect definition of the state of mind required to play jazz: ' with wanton heed and giddy cunning.' That's how you play jazz.”

21 likes